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Over The Hill Am I? Hah!

July 8, 2014


He paused and said, “Fine, inspire me,” arms crossed and eyebrows raised in disbelief that I could do any such thing.

Urania rolled her eyes, this had all been so much easier when she had just been only the muse of astronomy, now she was responsible for the gamut of human science and invention. She sighed heavily, “Take a good look at the materials to hand and I will help you with your escape plan.” Really, some humans! She had been inspiring this particular individual for decades but this was the first time he had ever acknowledged her existence.

The white-haired man snorted derisively, “Like they give us anything useful.” He said sourly as he obeyed.

“You might be surprised. I’ve gotten you out of tighter binds before this.”

“That’s true.” He acknowledged.

“You can use that lawn chair, those party streamers, the packages of balloons, and the helium tanks. Take them to the patio.” Urania told him patiently, pointing to each item in turn.

A spark kindled in the old man’s eyes. “Yes!” He hissed triumphantly, “I see where you’re going now!” He chortled happily. “Just wait until those sticks in the mud get a load of me! I’ll show them who’s over the hill, that’s the problem with this younger generation, no imagination!”

He began placing the supplies on his scooter. It took him three trips to get everything outside. Joints creaking in protest he rose and unfolded the lawn chair. He used an old leather belt to buckle one leg to the heavy wooden picnic table. He commenced filling the balloons with helium and tying them to the chair with ropes braided from the party streamers. It took him several hours, slowed as he was by arthritis, but he had nothing but time. After adding a number of balloons to the chair it began floating several inches from the ground tugging at its restraint. He added several more packages. As a precaution he sat in the chair, testing it. Even with his added weight it hovered in the air. He grunted in satisfaction. The lunch bell rang. It was now or never! His absence would soon be noticed. Just then alarms blared from the building. A jumbled mass of people poured outside. He unbuckled the belt and floated skyward.

“Angus! Come back here now! It’s time for your medications!” Nurse Brewster shouted. “Stop him!”

“Blasted Doctors, thinking that they know what’s best for everyone and ignoring what you say.” He grumbled and blew a noisemaker in the faces of the orderlies racing to restrain him. “The name is Macguyver!” He yelled defiantly. “So long boys!” He shouted gleefully as he soared away from the Rest Home for Retired Spies. The other residents clapped and cheered his escape. “I don’t know if you’re real or just a figment of my imagination like they swear you are, but thanks a lot Urania.” He said gratefully.

“I’m real enough and you’re welcome.” I said fading away, my work done for now.


500 Words in response to Finish That Thought – Year 2, Week 1 mandatory first sentence, 500 word limit, Special Challenge: Macguyver[ism], Special Festival Challenge: Include one or more party items (including, but not limited to: streamers, noisemakers, cake, ice cream, pinata, fireworks, etc)

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